How I Went From Overweight with Self-Hate, To Losing Eighty Pounds And Writing About Self-Love
Everything about myself is how I was meant to be.
I am thankful.
And that’s a big deal for me to say
Because when I was in middle school
I kept a black composition book in my dresser
And line after line, I wrote,
“I hate myself, I don’t want to live this life.”
Every day. Dated.
Page. After paige.
My parents eventually found it. Sat me down.
And honestly, it wasn’t until I graduated college (2015)
Until I actually started “liking” myself, and where this whole, “I am Paige Blessman,” thing was going.
Childhood obesity is not just a physical struggle, but a mental, social, and emotional struggle too!!!
Drowning in negative self-talk and anxiety- I’m so glad I learned to swim before anything else.
My faith in MySelf, in my strength amongst My struggles increased as I got faster and stronger in the gym!
Through it all… I’ve learned, the lesson is to Love yourSelf.
To forgive yourSelf.
To find a way to live in light of your mistakes.
To be open.
To stand up for yourSelf, and not hold your tongue.
To be open to what the future hands out.
To allow things to flow and fall.
To be okay with not being okay sometimes.
I have learned the lesson is, to never undervalue the importance of self love.
Self love includes introspection, silence and solitude.
KNOW THE SELF, THAT YOU ARE!!
LOVE THE SELF, THAT YOU ARE!
And intentionally stay away from things that make Your loved self, feel less than whole and fulfilled, you’ll feel a peace and happy heart that’s indescribable!
Growing up overweight, I finally understand where a lot of my mental, emotional, pain has come from.
From not loving myself.
I used to think I was meant to be overweight. I was meant to feel bad about myself.
So I had terrible, negative self talk. I was so mean to myself.
I owe myself so many apologies.
This journey says to me, “I do have a choice for myself. I can make change”
I could have kept my previous habits, and probably weigh +250lbs right now.
But I decided +230lbs was enough.
I decided to make cuts.
Cutting off bad habits, bad vibes, and bad social ties.
I decided to introduce myself to posi-tive vibes, posi-tive people, posi-tive messages, and healthy foods and habits.
I decided to go to the gym.
I decided to “figure it out.”
And really become the self I wanted to be.
We have a choice.
Make choices with self love always in mind.
Love yourself 1st.
Below are three things that were essential in my weight transformation and mental/emotional growth:
- Writing and reflecting, every day — I always wrote about what happened in my day and when I’d go back and read it.. I see how things / feelings / thoughts / situations / problems etc. come and go… mhmmm.
- Trying different (cardio) activities, and stepping out of my comfort zone — I did things like powderpuff football, and a choreographed performance, Zumba, cycling, kickboxing… Doing things for the first time and learning more about myself, (dis)likes, talents, abilities. And stilllll getting a great workout in!
- Going hard for at least 21 days, rest, and do another 21 days, rest and repeat — The point is: NEVER GIVE UP. Always just get back on track!!
Need some more posi-tive vibes?